culled from:http://www.marcandangel.com
When you stop chasing the wrong things you give
the right things a chance to catch you.
As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new
beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.” Nothing
could be closer to the truth. But before you can begin this process of
transformation you have to stop doing the things that have been holding
you back.
Here are some ideas to get you started:
- Stop spending time with the wrong people. – Life is
too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you.
If someone wants you in their life, they’ll make room for you. You
shouldn’t have to fight for a spot. Never, ever insist yourself to
someone who continuously overlooks your worth. And remember, it’s not
the people that stand by your side when you’re at your best, but the
ones who stand beside you when you’re at your worst that are your true
friends. - Stop running from your problems. – Face them head
on. No, it won’t be easy. There is no person in the world capable of
flawlessly handling every punch thrown at them. We aren’t supposed to
be able to instantly solve problems. That’s not how we’re made. In
fact, we’re made to get upset, sad, hurt, stumble and fall. Because
that’s the whole purpose of living – to face problems, learn, adapt, and
solve them over the course of time. This is what ultimately molds us
into the person we become. - Stop lying to yourself. – You can lie to anyone
else in the world, but you can’t lie to yourself. Our lives improve
only when we take chances, and the first and most difficult chance we
can take is to be honest with ourselves. (Read The Road Less Traveled.)
- Stop putting your own needs on the back burner. –
The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving
someone too much, and forgetting that you are special too. Yes, help
others; but help yourself too. If there was ever a moment to follow
your passion and do something that matters to you, that moment is now. - Stop trying to be someone you’re not. – One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like
everyone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be
smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you.
Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people
will love the real you. - Stop trying to hold onto the past. – You can’t start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading your last one.
- Stop being scared to make a mistake. – Doing
something and getting it wrong is at least ten times more productive
than doing nothing. Every success has a trail of failures behind it,
and every failure is leading towards success. You end up regretting the
things you did NOT do far more than the things you did. - Stop berating yourself for old mistakes. – We may
love the wrong person and cry about the wrong things, but no matter how
things go wrong, one thing is for sure, mistakes help us find the person
and things that are right for us. We all make mistakes, have
struggles, and even regret things in our past. But you are not your
mistakes, you are not your struggles, and you are here NOW with the
power to shape your day and your future. Every single thing that has
ever happened in your life is preparing you for a moment that is yet to
come. - Stop trying to buy happiness. – Many of the things
we desire are expensive. But the truth is, the things that really
satisfy us are totally free – love, laughter and working on our
passions. - Stop exclusively looking to others for happiness. –
If you’re not happy with who you are on the inside, you won’t be happy
in a long-term relationship with anyone else either. You have to create
stability in your own life first before you can share it with someone
else. (Read Stumbling on Happiness.)
- Stop being idle. – Don’t think too much or you’ll
create a problem that wasn’t even there in the first place. Evaluate
situations and take decisive action. You cannot change what you refuse
to confront. Making progress involves risk. Period! You can’t make it
to second base with your foot on first. - Stop thinking you’re not ready. – Nobody ever feels
100% ready when an opportunity arises. Because most great
opportunities in life force us to grow beyond our comfort zones, which
means we won’t feel totally comfortable at first. - Stop getting involved in relationships for the wrong reasons.
– Relationships must be chosen wisely. It’s better to be alone than to
be in bad company. There’s no need to rush. If something is meant to
be, it will happen – in the right time, with the right person, and for
the best reason. Fall in love when you’re ready, not when you’re
lonely. (Angel and I discuss this in detail in the “Relationships” chapter of 1,000 Little Things Happy, Successful People Do Differently.) - Stop rejecting new relationships just because old ones didn’t work.
– In life you’ll realize that there is a purpose for everyone you
meet. Some will test you, some will use you and some will teach you.
But most importantly, some will bring out the best in you. - Stop trying to compete against everyone else. –
Don’t worry about what others are doing better than you. Concentrate on
beating your own records every day. Success is a battle between YOU
and YOURSELF only. - Stop being jealous of others. – Jealousy is the art
of counting someone else’s blessings instead of your own. Ask yourself
this: “What’s something I have that everyone wants?” - Stop complaining and feeling sorry for yourself. –
Life’s curveballs are thrown for a reason – to shift your path in a
direction that is meant for you. You may not see or understand
everything the moment it happens, and it may be tough. But reflect back
on those negative curveballs thrown at you in the past. You’ll often
see that eventually they led you to a better place, person, state of
mind, or situation. So smile! Let everyone know that today you are a
lot stronger than you were yesterday, and you will be. - Stop holding grudges. – Don’t live your life with
hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the
people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is
okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my
happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the answer… let go, find peace,
liberate yourself! And remember, forgiveness is not just for other
people, it’s for you too. If you must, forgive yourself, move on and
try to do better next time. - Stop letting others bring you down to their level. – Refuse to lower your standards to accommodate those who refuse to raise theirs.
- Stop wasting time explaining yourself to others. – Your friends don’t need it and your enemies won’t believe it anyway. Just do what you know in your heart is right.
- Stop doing the same things over and over without taking a break.
– The time to take a deep breath is when you don’t have time for it.
If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’ll keep getting what you’re
getting. Sometimes you need to distance yourself to see things clearly. - Stop overlooking the beauty of small moments. –
Enjoy the little things, because one day you may look back and discover
they were the big things. The best portion of your life will be the
small, nameless moments you spend smiling with someone who matters to
you. - Stop trying to make things perfect. – The real world doesn’t reward perfectionists, it rewards people who get things done. (Read Getting Things Done
.)
- Stop following the path of least resistance. – Life
is not easy, especially when you plan on achieving something
worthwhile. Don’t take the easy way out. Do something extraordinary. - Stop acting like everything is fine if it isn’t. –
It’s okay to fall apart for a little while. You don’t always have to
pretend to be strong, and there is no need to constantly prove that
everything is going well. You shouldn’t be concerned with what other
people are thinking either – cry if you need to – it’s healthy to shed
your tears. The sooner you do, the sooner you will be able to smile
again. - Stop blaming others for your troubles. – The extent
to which you can achieve your dreams depends on the extent to which you
take responsibility for your life. When you blame others for what
you’re going through, you deny responsibility – you give others power
over that part of your life. - Stop trying to be everything to everyone. – Doing
so is impossible, and trying will only burn you out. But making one
person smile CAN change the world. Maybe not the whole world, but their
world. So narrow your focus. - Stop worrying so much. – Worry will not strip
tomorrow of its burdens, it will strip today of its joy. One way to
check if something is worth mulling over is to ask yourself this
question: “Will this matter in one year’s time? Three years? Five
years?” If not, then it’s not worth worrying about. - Stop focusing on what you don’t want to happen. –
Focus on what you do want to happen. Positive thinking is at the
forefront of every great success story. If you awake every morning with
the thought that something wonderful will happen in your life today,
and you pay close attention, you’ll often find that you’re right. - Stop being ungrateful. – No matter how good or bad
you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere
else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about
what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else
is missing.
